just another day past.
nthg much.

ytd gt back result,
did much better than before.
i made great improvement for sci especially.

he's the first which i wished to share w,
but i feel so lousy after i told him.
i dont knw how to explain the feelin,
simply sucks to the core.
to him,
it's just only joke.
but result to me really meant alot.
arghhh-
>:((((((((
i dont knw how to say!

fuckin-

_|_
fuck myself.
bye-

i believe at the end of this endless road,
there will always be a way out.
trust yourself u're able to do it.
don't be depress anymore.
be strong my dear friend.
it's not the end yet,
it's just the startin after this road.
when u need help,
just said it out.
tkcare my dearest.
rui-

Title: Gotta Go My Own Way.

Gabriella
I gotta say what's in my mind
Something about us
doesn't seem right these days
life keeps getting in the way
Whenever we try, somehow the plan
is always rearranged
It's so hard to say
But I've gotta do what's best for me
You'll be ok..
I've go to move on and be who I am
I just don't belong here
I hope you understand
We might find our place in this
world someday
But at least for now
I gotta go my own way
Don't wanna leave it all behind
But I get my hopes up
and I watch them fall everytime
Another colour turns to grey
and it's just too hard to watch it all
slowly fade away
I'm leaving today 'cause I've
gotta do what's best for me
you'll be ok..
I've got to move on and be who I am
I just don't belong here
I hope you understand
We might find our place in this
world someday
But at least for now
I gotta go my own way

Troy
What about us?
What about everything we've been through?

Gabriella
What about trust?

Troy
you know I never wanted to hurt you

Gabriella
and what about me?

Troy
What am I supposed to do?

Gabriella
I gotta leave but I'll miss you

Troy
I'll miss you

Gabriella
so
I've got to move on and be who I am

Troy
Why do you have to go?

Gabriella
I just don't belong here
I hope you understand

Troy:
I'm trying to understand

Gabriella
We might find our place in this
world someday
but at least for now

Troy
I want you to stay

Gabriella
I wanna go my own way
I've got to move on and be who I am

Troy
What about us?

Gabriella
I just don't belong here
I hope you understand

Troy
I'm trying to understand

Gabriella
We might find our place in this
world someday
but at least for now
I gotta go my own way
I gotta go my own way
I gotta go my own way

this is the song,
u ask me to listen.
nw i finally,
understand..

well-
i'm still feelin very vexed & down.
don't knw why.

stayed up late last night,
& have to wake up so early to work.
damnit-
it's so tiring.
but still i always can't sleep when i reach home.

would only use back my no. till tml.
so frens,
anything tml then say or find me online alright.

my day was ruined alr,
it's only 11.
& my day was alr ruined.
sad case i knw.

mom was mad w me don't knw for what.
when i don't even see her for abt 3 days?
weird-

met on train,
we speak less than 10 words.
pathetic.
SCREWED!

quarrel-ed ytd.
end up,
i'm the unreasonable one again.
for god-sake.
i gave in so much,
yet?
damnit-
i'm not gng to care anymore.
doin what i want,
& whatsoever.

is there really such thing call opposite attraction?
the one u attract,
would be a whole different things frm u,
how u all gng to survive by this?
thinking & all kinda stuff.
there's no thing u both can agree on.
but still u still love this guy?
mkin the both of them miserable right?
but i realise all this things always happen.
BUT WHY?!

anyone knw why izzit so?
damnit-
i'm really bored in this freezin counter.
that's why all this funny things come to me.
BYE!

no one understand,
no one care.
i'm dyin over who knws?

all u knw is to scold me & say i give attitude.
do u really knw how am i feelin nw.
no u don't.

fuckin hell-
i'm feelin so terrible over at here.
whr are u?

i haven eaten for the whole day,
all u knw is to ask me to run out & eat.
i told u e reason why i can't yet u still insist it's okay.
fuckin-
no one understand.

now i realise helpin ppl doesn't mean they would help u back,
they will only tke u for granted.
every single one is selfish,
all they think is abt themselves.
what abt ppl ard u?
they don't care simply.

i can jolly well,
fuck off & rest in peace.
fuck whatever.

i really learn alot alot.
by helpin others doesn't means they will help u.
they will just think of a way,
that would not cause trouble to them & let u die yourself.

fine-
i'll die myself.
all i shall say,
i'm only being stupid.
that's all.

care so much for ppl,
in return.
die myself.
help ppl so much,
in return.
die myself.

fuckin stupid.
yes i knw.
damnit-

life sucks for me recently.

workin nw.
feelin very down,
my back hurts alot.
yet i still have to come.
sigh-
>:((((((
what to do?

when i'm down u're not w me,
sayin u're busy & stuff like that.
yet i don't think u're busy or whatever.
my back is damn painful mind u.
if i'nm alright,
why must i keep mkin a big fuss over everything?
maybe u don't understand,
or maybe u won't even knw what i'm bloggin over here.

what u're doin is exactly what u're doin in the past,
do u knw?
indeed u did change few wks back,
but nw?
doesn't matter-
u knw i'll get used to it & u just pretend u don't knw anything.
like in the past.

u promised say once after your bike stuff is done u'll be free.
nw-
let's wait & see.
what will happen after your bike stuff.
wish me good luck peeps!

tml gng for doc again for my damn back.
think is cos of the weather,
that's why it hurt so much.

the fall i had is for real,
i'm not lying.
for what to lie over such stuff.
it's like cursing myself to fall right.
retarded-

i'm so bored right nw.
back pain plus no customer,
equal pathetic.
sittin here & freeze!
wonderful-

damn!
what a day for me.

signed off-

lots of things happen to me.
mostly the unhappy one.
don't knw wher to start frm & how to start.

i'm not really happy recently.
totally not enojoyin.
>:(((((((((((

doesn't have mood for lots of stuff.
problems after problems.
what a happy new yr for me.
hope it would be better soon.
sigh-

a changed of job.
to a new environment.
have to re-adapt to lots of things.
result is comin out soon,
means more things to come.
god-
think i'll be damn busy w lots of stuff soon.
friends; family; sch; work.
how am i gng to strike a balance between all these 4.
i don't think i can do it.

too much of things for me to cope w.
i'm alr facin lots of problems,
mostly on works & some other stuff.
they just don't stop.

being able to fool ard & laugh doesn't mean i'm okay.
i'm very very stresed up.
but i doesn't knw how to voice it out.
i just kept quiet most of the time,
hoping everything would end.
i'm not runnin away frm problem.
but it's just that i don't knw how to handle all these at one go.

as we grow older more & more problems,
more & more responsibility.
i really don't wish to face all these comin to me.
being resposibility over every single thing is very important,
yet tiring.

we're taught to be responsible since young.
but still,
why ther's ppl runnin frm all this bullshit sutff,
without a words.
izit that they're too stressed up till they can't tke it,
or just that they're just being a coward.
i guess,
there will always be time ppl wish to be a coward.
just to tke a rest before a bigger storm arrived.

well-
everyone thinks differently.
but still,
don't keep runnin away frm all the problems,
just face it.
thou u can't solve it.
but still u're strong enough to face it.

that's all.
tke care peeps.
will come back soon:DDD